I met this seemingly nice young man on a dating site. At first, he tried to pursue me and I resisted, for one thing I was faithful to my ex for the entire 15 years we had been together and was just not ready to consider another man, for another I was still too hurt to trust anyone. And this young man (who called himself Mike Phillips) was 16 years younger then I, and from his picture quite handsome (I wonder who that REALLY is?). He persisted, and I kept telling him that he was young and handsome and could have his pick of woman, why go after an older woman in a wheelchair? He needed someone young and vibrant like himself...still, he persisted. Then one day came the "undying love" line...I asked him "How can you say you LOVE me when you don't even KNOW me?" He responded that the heart chooses who the heart chooses. Still I resisted, but still we chatted on. He said he was from an area not far from me, and was a civil engineer, here working on a bridge project. Seemed reasonable. Then we didn't really talk for a bit, I still had him on my contact's list but pretty much ignored him.
And suddenly, he was back, with a fervor...constantly wooing me, flattering me (stupid old woman that I am), saying all the right things.
Next thing I know, he was overseas, in Switzerland. Ok, so far no red flags up for me. Then he goes to Ghana. Ot oh, red flag. But he persists, telling me he is there on a railroad project. Oh, ok, I guess...
I was having a down day, he said he wanted to send me something to cheer me up. I figure, the guy is 1/2 a world away, what is the harm? and give him my address. My building is a secure one, anyway, so I felt safe. I didn't know the devil rides UPS and Fedex (not their fault, they didn't know it, either)
So a few days later, a dozen long-stemmed red roses come...WOW! Nobody has done that for me since I can remember. Then a teddy bear...aawwww how sweet... then a few other things come, small ones, and then some men's sneakers. Men's sneakers??? He asks me can I keep them for him for awhile? I asked him why send them HERE, why not to Ghana? His answer is plausible...he said that because of the Nigerian scammers most American companies won't ship to that part of the world. Oh, ok. Little did I know...
And the thing is, I did NOT know, I did not know that I had just opened the door to a major scammer. And that is why I am writing all of this, I am not proud of my part in it, I should have been more cautious, but I guess I wanted to believe someone could love me again. Now I know better. Oh BOY do I know better...and I will bet that there are a LOT of women out there who would fall into the very same trap, that is why I am writing this, to alert them, so they do not end up in the deep hole that I am in, next to me...and believe me, there is room in here for us all.
See, I had always thought scammers try to scam you OUT of things. Things, money...but I hadn't thought of TRUST as a scammable item, and it most assuredly IS. Read on, please.
Soon there were more and more things coming, not for me, for him. And his co-workers. Then he hits me with, that he had gone to an orphanage and saw the poverty and wanted to send things to them. AAwww, whatta guy. I bet he also rescues puppies and kitties and helps little old ladies across the street.
Ok, at about this time I had quite a few things here, and he asks me to mail them to him (in Ghana, yes). I scrounged up a few boxes and pack all of the "stuffs" (as he calls it) into them. He emails me a mailing label, I print it out and tape it to the box, then the DHL (I think the first one was) person comes and gets it and off it goes...So there, I think, that's that. BBBZZZZ....there come more packages. And more. So I store those items, too...and on it goes...meanwhile, he is still wooing me promising me this wonderful life (as soon as he gets home). I notice that every time he is *supposed* to come home, something happens. I also notice that almost every time I ask him something he suddenly "has to go, work calls". Well, ok, it could happen, why not? Meanwhile, he is still professing undying love, and I have told him over and over that while I am fond of him I will not say I love you until I meet him face-to-face and KNOW that I do.
So one day he is having a "bad day" and to make him feel better I say it. Oh I bet he and his "co-workers" got a real laugh out of that one. I bet he turned to his co-worker and said "Oy, Yohimbe...mumble-mumble-glottle-stop-glottle-stop" which translates, in English, to "we got her, Joe (Yohimbe is Ghanese for Joe)" to which Yohimbe said "mumble-mumble WOOHOO" (no translation needed).
Then he offers to help me with my bills. Really? You sure? Because I was really struggling, and needed the help. So (of course you have figured out that by now I trust him) I give him the login for my comcast and electric bills, both of which can be paid online. He asks me to check my balance, and sure enough, he has not only paid them, but left a positive balance! Wow!!!
I am disabled and SSI doesn't cover much, and after the rent is paid, there is very little left, SO...when "Mike" offered to help me with my bills I was ecstatic...Oh I thanked him over and over...what an idiot I am.
So my bills are paid, my home is safe, life seems pretty good, just waiting for the next custody hearing to try to get my son home with me again. Then the day before yesterday, there is a knock on my door. Police! Ok, what seems to be the problem? They said there had been a 911 call about my address. So I let them come in and they see that I am warm, cozy and peacefully noodling away at my PC. They tell me they are looking for a "phillips" I said that's my boyfriend (funny thing is, that is the first time I have ever referred to him in that way.) he is not even in the states, he is in Ghana. I give them his address and other information. They leave. HHmmm...some mystery. So I ask him about it, finding it odd that I have to explain to him that a 911 call is an emergency call, that they were not looking for him to arrest him but because they thought there was something wrong. Yesterday...another knock on the door..Police! Ok, what seems to be the problem? He comes in and we talk, he said there had been a call, gave me a number to call back. So I call it, and my world started a fast fall into hell.
It seems there IS no "Mike Phillips" well, there might be, but he isn't it. And all the "stuffs"? bought with stolen credit cards. Stolen? Of ALL of the things that I had thought about in these months, there was the one place I had NEVER gone...I just don't think that way. The end result? Here I sit at my PC, still noodling, I ONLY still have internet/phone/TV because the comcast people took pity on my and are working with me. Gotta give them major kudos for that. Especially since my neighbor owes them less and they turned her services off. Maybe my being disabled helps there?
They understood that he'd paid my bills with stolen credit cards and of course the charges were reversed. I still owe about $1,000 and I have about $75 to my name. Good thing eviction takes 3 months. Maybe by that time I will have my son home and/or it will be warm enough out to be homeless. I just wonder where I will plug in my power chair.
So please, PLEASE, take my naivite and stupidity as a lesson, if your seemingly perfect man starts doing what he did, REFUSE THE PACKAGES...ALL OF THEM. If only ONE woman heeds this, it will have been worth the humiliation.
You know, I used to think myself a fair judge of character. And I am, I am an awesome judge of character...to wit, if you find a man you think is "the man", bring him to me, introduce us, if I like him, run for the hills like the devil himself were behind you.
Since I wrote that, I have communicated with "mike" again, got the story out of him...he is not a 39 year old white man, but a 20-something black man from Ghana (that is his pic up top, I got it off my webcam). The picture of the white man, "mike" said, was provided by Frank. I wish I knew who that REALLY is, I'd like to let him know what his image is being used for.
"Mike" was hired to do this, he professes to not know that the cards were stolen (yeah, sure) told me that the man who hired him is a one Frank Gibson, from Canada. I don't really believe that, either, because I know some of the items were FOR "frank". Why would he have them sent here then to Ghana if he is in Canada?
And "Mike"s REAL name is Mathias Doku.
